Friday, May 25, 2012

Not so happy things

So I have been trying really hard to make sure that my blog stays a really happy and positive environment. I tend to create blogs and then only write on them when I am upset. However, lets be real. We all need some time to vent and just take a load off our shoulders, and so that is what I am about to do. I do not want this blog to become a place where I am constantly unloading things, however it can be necessary every once in a while.

So, my summer started exactly three weeks and two days ago. While I was at school, I was so ridiculously excited for summer and freedom and to be able to do whatever the heck I wanted. But now here I am, three weeks into it and I am just so frustrated! I want to go on lots of adventures and make lots and lots of memories this summer, and it just doesn't seem like anyone else really gives a shit. Its not even that no one cares, everyone is just super busy. Melissa is back at school, I don't even know what the heck Maria is doing but I haven't heard from her, Helga is "busy", Megan has three jobs, Ariel and Faline both live far and both work. Ugh, and this just sucks. It makes me feel like I have no one to depend on and no one to enjoy life with. I used to feel so confident in the fact that I had multiple friendships that were super strong, and now I feel like I am just swimming out here alone with a few people stopping by every once in a while. And its kind of a sucky lonely feeling. I've been trying to not let it get to me, but now that I am actually addressing the problem and talking about it, I am feeling really shitty. I just don't know what to do. I want new friends or something. I should try and hang out with people from work actually. I really like Mikhaila and Jennie, and I've always liked Marissa. I guess that could work. I also just really want a new job or to volunteer. 

Ugh, I hate feeling sorry for myself. I just need to be more proactive. So, I am going to try harder to make plans with people. I am also going to try harder to hang out with new people since all of my old friends seem to be super busy this summer. Buuut, I also have to understand that this is Memorial Day Weekend, and most folks are away this weekend so if I can't find anyone to hang out with is not because I suck, its just because people do shit around this time. THE END.

Anyone else feel like they're a little blue this summer?