Happy Birthday to Me

So my birthday today started off really lame. It consisted of calling people, struggling to put plans together, 3 hours on a train, not wanting to do anything, and going back to Jersey after heading all the way to Brooklyn. However today I realized the importance and beauty of family; they'll be there no matter what, and thats kinda lovely to know. So even though today was lame, it made me really grateful for my silly little family. And thats kinda an important thing to recognize. 

Another thing that happened today; I realized that I need to make some serious changes in my life. I saw two sets of pictures, ones from me when I was in 4th-5th grade, when I was a serious fatty and ones when I was in 7th grade when I had slimmed down a lot. In 7th grade I was so thin! I have gained some serious chub since then, and its not okay. So I need to change my lifestyle. I always write on here about how I need to eat better and run more, but those are nice ideas in thought; I need to put them into practice! And more than just eat better and run; I need to make a lifestyle change. I need to make a promise to myself. A promise that consists of being all around more active and all around more conscious of what I am eating. Like I always say, moderation is a big thing; just because I want to eat better doesn't mean I can never eat ice cream ever again. It just means I can't get ice cream at the rutgers zone and then have strawberry ice cream daquori's and then have spamoni ice cream the next day; and it means I can't have stromboli two nights in a row! So yeah. Heres to my 19th year, heres to a lifestyle change (starting tomorrow, cause you can't do things like that on your birthday), and heres to the bucketlist I posted lastnight and heres to family!

My Last Day Being 18

Today is my last day as an eighteen year old! I decided in honor of this, I'd make a bucketlist of things I'd like to acomplish when I am 19!

1. Run 3x a week, and keep a log of my runs and milage. 

2. Eat healthier, but also recognize that moderation is lovely.

3. Learn Spanish

4. Master at least 5 songs on piano and guitar

5. Finally get a 6 pack!

6. Kiss a boy (a silly thing to put on a bucketlist, but being boyfriendless, ya never know! But I'd like atleast one kiss, if not many, while I am 19!)

7. Meditate every single day

8. Read every single book on my list of books I currently want to read (Fight Club, Alice in Wonderland, Through the Looking Glass, Catcher in the Rye, Girl With the Dragon Tattoo, Faline's Article, A Thousand Splendid Suns, The Book Thief , Finish Harry Potter, Sand and Fog, Peter Pan, American Gods, Neverwhere , Coraline, Pride and Prejudice , The Lemon Tree, Never Let Me Go, Slumdog Millionaire, A Clockwork Orange, Everything is Illuminated)

9. Get another tattoo

10. Run a triathalon

11. Volunteer for a soup kitchen or at a hospital

12. Go camping

13. Do something really outrageous 

This is all I can think of for not; I am in a bit of a rush. But I am pretty happy with the list so far. I want to add a few outrageous things to this list too though!

Misc.

I seriously don't take pictures anymore which is so lame! I never have anything to post. Hm. So I just decided this right now, and I like the idea. Every day in the month of April (the month of my birth!) I will take one photo! Yes, I like that idea a lot. Anyways, nothing really exciting has been happening. That is actually a lie. Things have been changing. For a while, after Fernando and I broke up, I felt like I was really beginning to find myself. Now I feel like I am beginning to lose myself again, and I guess I am okay with that. It just means that I am waiting to turn into the person I really want to be and am really proud of. A lot of things are changing for me right about how; I am going to cut my hair really short, I am thinking of cutting meat out of my diet (I don't want to say I am thinking of becoming a vegetarian because gah, that would mean labeling myself), I am trying to learn to swim to train for a triathlon, I am really trying to focus on my school work and stay motivated in hopes of getting into the Rutgers nursing program. And yeah, thats just a taste of it!

Weird to be posting a picture of Fernando on my blog right now, but its one of the only pictures I have from my birthday last year. Anyways, my birthday THIS YEAR is coming up, and its kinda exciting cause I feel like I have changed quite a bit from the person that I was last year. I feel like I am a lot more independent, a lot more motivated, probably more social and outgoing. I have more knowledge (its arguable about whether or not thats a good thing). I can't explain it, but I am pretty proud of the person that I am right now. Obviously I have my flaws; eating too much crap (which I am working on; as always), sometimes saying mean things, procrastinating etc. But my flaws are just more ways that I can improve myself and become a better person, and I am excited for the challenge!