Recently I have been feeling like a little kid who got lost in her moms closet and makeup bag whenever I get ready. I am trying to figure out my own personal style, and so I am failing a lot along the way. The other day, I was wearing a black dress with grey tights, black boots and purple socks that peeked over my boots. On top of that, I was wearing my green puffy winter coat that falls just below my hips, making my dress look like an awkward mini skirt. It was so bad that my boss, a 27 year old man who wear crocks, commented on my outfit saying "Check out that fashion statement!". Thats how you know you have accomplished a serious fashion no-no. I wish I had a picture so I could show just how lame I looked.
Also recently, I have invested in Urban Decays Naked Palette, hoping that pretty eyeshadow will distract from the fact that my hair is in a seriously awkward phase of growing out right now. Well, being that I have never really worn eyeshadow before, playing around with this eyeshadow has been a lot of trial and error. Mostly error that I don't have time to correct which leaves me feeling incredibly self conscious. But hopefully one day I will get it right. Either way, its fun to experiment with different colors and see what kind of affect they have.
Its sort of weird to be going through these things at 19 and a lot of times it leaves me feeling really uncomfortable and like I am still just a little kid. These are things that kids in middle school and high school go through - not college! I guess I just didn't really care that much back then. I remember once in high school, applying powder concealer all over my face and liquid foundation under my eyes. I felt quite silly when my friend explained to me that these products are used in opposite ways. And after that I just never really cared to learn. Same with clothes. I love looking at other peoples pretty outfits, but I never cared too much to create pretty outfits of my own. For the most part skinny jeans, a v-neck and a cardigan are good for me. Maybe a scarf if I am feeling really fashionable.
Has anyone else gone through a similar weirdness of self discovery at such a late age? Any tips on how to deal with this?